


Why Does It Hurt to Love You?

by Bluewolfeevee



Category: Aphfinland, Aphsweden, Hetalia - Fandom, Hetalia: Axis Powers, Sufin - Fandom
Genre: Angst, Blood, Denmark helping, Feels, Gore, Hanahaki Disease, I'm not sorry, M/M, one-sided
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-08-31
Updated: 2019-10-09
Packaged: 2020-10-01 00:24:40
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Major Character Death
Chapters: 3
Words: 1,639
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/20456045
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Bluewolfeevee/pseuds/Bluewolfeevee
Summary: Sweden has always loved Finland but at what cost is it? Does it cost him his life or does he earn someone he loved the second he met him.Why did it hurt to love finland





	1. Chapter 1

It hurt. All of it the unrequited love, the flowers growing in his lungs, and blood splatter flower petals.  
He wanted it all to go away.  
He wanted him to tell him.  
He wanted to be close to him.  
It hurt.  
He felt the blood being coughed into the ever-growing pool.  
He felt the tears streaming down his face the first in the longest time.  
Why did it hurt so much, he repeated over and over.  
\-------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------  
It was another meeting of the Nordics. Unlike the World and G8 meetings, the Nordic meetings were always a lot more successful and tamer.  
Of course, Norway pressuring Iceland into calling him big brother was a bother.  
Denmark drinking and yelling was also a big bother but who cared when a sweet Finnish sat across the table. God his smile melted his heart.  
“Alright! Sweden what’s up with your country!” Denmark slammed his hands against the table, pretty much yelled in his ear.  
“Mm. Noth’ng m’ch,” The Swedish responded quite disappointed he was breaking out of his stare.  
“Really nothing?” The Den gave him a confused look.  
“Y’s,”  
“Alright! Finland what about you?” The Den suddenly turn to the small Fin.  
“Oh! My country wants to import more! Also, we kinda scared of-” Finland continued with his country status. You can’t shut him up once he starts. Sweden smiled at the thought.

“Sweden stop the scary face!” Norway called out from across the table. At least he took a break from forcing Iceland into calling him, big brother.

“Mm. Sorry,” Sweden turned his head away, looking off towards the wall.  
“I think Mr. Sweden was just smiling,” Finland commented tilting his head into a smile.  
“I doubt that’s a smile,” Iceland commented from the side quite annoyed.  
“No, It’s definitely a smile,”  
“Alright...Whatever you say,” Iceland huffed, huddling into his clothes.  
“Are you sure you had nothing, Mr. Sweden? Didn’t Denmark and you have a trade deal?” Finland looked off curiously towards Sweden.

A painful swell grew in Sweden’s chest as he tried to respond to the small blonde question.  
“Y’s,” Finland walked over to Sweden taking a seat beside him. He rested his chin on his hand, looking at Sweden with those big bluish-violet eyes.  
“It went f’ne.” The small pale hand placed beside his made him feel sick.  
“Okay!” Iceland you're last! Tell us about how things are going in your place.” He felt like he was going to throw up as Finland moved back to his seat.  
“Of course I’m last,” The Icelandic mutter guilty loud enough for everyone to hear.  
“No! No! Iceland! I just meant that cause you’re the youngest!” Berwald painfully coughed into his arm. Why did it hurt so much? When he lifted his head out of his arm he noticed the jacket splattered in blood and small white petals. 

“Mm. Den c’n I go to b’throom?” Sweden quickly hiding his blood splatter arm under the table.  
“Sure! Just hurry back, alright!” He stood up quickly making his exit out the door.

His throat hurt and all that covered the floor was petals and blood. Lots of blood. It teased him, didn’t it? It reminded him that matter how much affection he showed or was capable of showing was for nothing.  
Finland ...Tino would never love him back in the same way. Maybe he wanted to cry or profusely confess his love towards the Fin but the question reminded.  
Why was he coughing up flowers?  
How did he know it was connected towards his feelings to Tino?  
The best course of action was to ask Japan; he knew it was loosely connected to him somehow.

His legs were weak so was his ability to breath when he got up. He slid the coat off hooking it upon his arm. The door creaked open as Sweden left.  
Down the hall, a blonde spikey hair Den was coming towards him.  
“Hey, Swede! Wait up!” He didn’t get to hear what Denmark was trying to say. 

The Swedish was quickly gone before the Danish got there. He couldn’t let the loudmouth see or anyone else for that matter except Japan.

\------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------


	2. Chapter 2

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Denmark saw. Why didn't Sweden tell anyone? Why was hurting himself on purpose...

How did he lose him so quick?  
He knew what was happening. The coughing didn't sound good, and neither did the seemingly quick cover-up.

He saw the blood on the black tuxedo jacket, saw the small white and blue petals that accompanied it.

God, Swede you messed up bad.

When he saw Swede got up to leave for the bathroom. He waited until Iceland was done with his country update before dismissing the meeting early.

He quickly rushed in Sweden's direction trying not to give off too much to the rest of the Nordics. 

"Hey, Swede! Wait up!" He desperately called to his frenemy.

"Listen! Can we talk!?" He lost him so quickly.

Denmark turned to the bathroom door creaking it open. He saw the blood spread over the floor and the petals that were thrown in the trash. 

A ping of pain hit Denmark hard. Sure, Sweden and him fought a lot. A lot. A LOT but he never wanted to see him reduced to this. Reduce to love he'll never receive from the other. 

"Can I got to the bathroom or you're going keep gawking?" The emotionless voice of Norway interrupted his thoughts.

"AH! HAHA! The sorry bathroom is off-limits!" He quickly turned giving the Norwegian a fake smile.

"But I need to go." He stared into Den's eyes, unamused.

"Too bad you're going have to use the bathroom at home, lortehoved!" 

"That isn't very nice to say but all well." And with that, the Norwegian turned away and was gone.

He bite his lip. Going to Sweden's house was the only way to talk to him, the only problem was Finland. If Finland found out he wouldn't stop doting and talking about it. Lets hope the Fin was busy.


	3. Hanahaki

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Japan was seated with 'The Lion of The North.' He was scary of course but his problem was harder to deal with.
> 
> He had Hanahaki.

The quiet and composed Japanese man took a sip of his tea. His guest was quite unexpected especially since he had minimal interaction with him. Ironic but here they were, sitting across from each other with Japan feeling uneased by his guest.

"May I ask why you here?"

Japan saw the pain in the Jade eyes as he reached into his pocket to pull out small, white and blue petals. The petals weren't petals but small bellflowers. 

"Ah. Rily of the Valley native to Finland."

Sweden nodded in turmoil.

"Have you come to show me flowers? If so that's very generous but why urgent?" Japan took another long sip of tea. The bellflowers were pretty and it was nice to see another country he hadn't known too well.

He saw Sweden frown. The truth was the Swedish never talked too much but this was getting uncomfortable.

"Hn. I've be'n coughing up the flowers." Sweden showed no sign of changing emotions but from what he could tell he wasn't joking.

"I see. You've come to the right place, my friend." Japan slowly raised from his seating place.

"Come. We will talk about your problem in a much more comfortable place. Where I am not staring at you from across the table." Japan walked to his small garden in front of his house from there he took a seat.

Once properly sat down Japan looked to his company. 

“Hanahaki Disease is a sickness that’s plagued my people for centuries. It causes the host to cough up flowers when unrequited love is present between two. Rare cases have more than one.” Japan frowned when a cherry blossom petal fluttered into his hand.

“In many cases, Hanahaki can cause Death if love is not returned. The other method is to remove the flowers from your lungs by surgery but you lose the feelings.” Japan turned to his company. The taller facial expression for once changed into lost and deeply pained.

“I’m guessing you are not picking the second option?” Japan himself was once a victim up this Disease, therefore, he already knew the second option wasn’t a choice.

“Yes. How long?” His voice had also a change of pitch. A lower tone that someone gives when they were on the verge of crying.

“Two months. Last week you will have an increase in sleep. The last three days you will be induced with a fever then you die.” Japan didn’t want to cripple his company with fear but telling the truth will be more beneficial for him to tell his feelings.

“Now may I ask who it is?” Japan commented as the silence filled the small lifeful garden.

“Finland.” Maybe it was the fact that Sweden knew the cause of his love that he told Japan so quickly or the building up of the need to tell someone that wasn’t himself.

“I see. Tell him soon. You are interesting and I will hate to lose contact with you. Kitekurete arigato soshite seiko o inoru.” Japan gave a deep bow as Sweden nodded. 

From there both different countries had parted ways with information too sensitive to mention now.

Sweden only had one option. That was to move out of the house with Finland for a while and then tell him about his love for him. The uncertainty of his life laid in his hands and Sweden was watching it crumble before him.

He knew countries could die.  
He knew if Finland didn’t return it he would die.  
He knew Peter wouldn’t have Sweden.  
He knew his other three children wouldn’t have him either.  
He knew that if he did die someone will replace him.  
Sweden was stuck.  
Finland...Tino would never return his love.

Maybe if he tried ... maybe. Tino would return the love and these horrible flowers would go away. The more Berwald dwelled on these thoughts the more he started to cough up his killer...his teaser....his enemy.


End file.
